Thursday, 13th July 2017
There are certain times that a person feels truly at loss. Today is one of those days. I am writing to you from my couch staring at the dawn light and almost seeing a ray of hope. Sometimes you try several times to fix your own mistake but it doesn’t work. Last night spent staring at the ceiling at my friend’s place who gave me a pillow and a blanket to get through the dark night. My life once so beautifully planned crumbled in just ten minutes and I am really dreading to make the breakfast. I strongly feel like I want to sleep through this entire day. I have had enough of people, misfortune, me trying to fix something and making it worse and most of all no help.
Before it is officially a year here I would like to make a blog post. I have written several ones prior to this but I didn’t feel 100% about posting them. So this is my last attempt.
Today I was just looking around my room and it is the Continue reading
When do you decide to draw a line? I have been struggling with it for the past three years since I have started this blog and my public IG account. There are days that I just want to disappear no joke but when I see that my viewers have been coming here for Islamic knowledge and clicking on all those links that lead to Continue reading
There are numerous times that I was worried and ungrateful but Alhamdulillah for everything. Alhamdulillah for tonight when I will be awake and doing my work. Alhamdulillah for the guidance to Salafiyyah. Alhamdulillah for all the times I controlled my anger. Alhamdulillah for sad times. Alhamdulillah for the silence that follows the night. I feel content. From now on I will live in the present and not allow the future to destroy my current moments and days. Alhamdulillah.
Basically I learned one word today. The Malaysian slang for ”whatever” and ”anything”. We use lah as a slang in the end of everything for e.g ok lah, do lah, can lah, die lah when we are disappointed and angry at someone. ”You can’t cinchai marry someone.” which got me Continue reading
Monday, 16 January 2017
As I slowly push myself off my bed, nudging to start my day at night. I do my usual chores and all of a sudden I can feel my inside shivering. Its 6am and I am prostrating but I can still feel myself shaking. I am not scared. I am not ill. I am just Continue reading